Wonderfully Chaotic Blended Family

3 Super Stepfamily Strengths
  1. How to Avoid the Blended Family Split
  2. Inspiring Blended Family Quotes
  3. His exact words were, “I think this could be good for us.”

Plans are made and then they change due to some dynamic that's often out of our control and even outside of our own household. Kids get a front row seat in learning to go with the flow when they grow up in a blended family.


Flexibility helps them become better thinkers, responders and problem solvers when something doesn't go as expected. And it's not just the kids. We get to learn the value of flexibility too which will help us in our partnership, at work, in our social life and just about anywhere else we're around people. Those of us living in blended families experience lots of problems that other families never have to face. We deal with problems building bonds in step-relationships. We encounter problems co-parenting with our Ex's.

How to Avoid the Blended Family Split

Sometimes adults in stepfamilies take the "just get over it" approach, which is a discussion for another time. But step-couples who choose to approach problems with the attitude of "let's get through it", give their blended family the gift of resilience. Over the years, we've discovered that every time we face a problem and put the effort in to get each member of our family through it rather than over it, we build resilience. Every success and every failure becomes a lesson that prepares us for the next challenge. The more we've faced, the speedier we get at recovery. Once again…a great life lesson for our kids.

They're going to face problems in life. Relational, emotional, social and vocational problems that they'll need to work through. The resilience you're building into them today will keep them on track. It may be difficult to see at this point in your journey, but every time you move through a problem in your blended family, you're equipping yourself and your kids with the Super Strength of Resilience! I've lived my entire life in more than one blended family. I was born into a blended family.

My mom passed away when I was young and we formed another blended family when my dad remarried.

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  • Inspiring Blended Family Quotes?
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Fast forward to my marriage day where Kim and I formed our own blended family. Better yet, I know the awesome benefits of these Super Strengths that can develop out of a beautiful, wonderful, chaotic and crazy blended family life. What other Super Strengths have you discovered on your blended family journey? Leave a comment below…. Kim Anderson Mike Anderson.

Bonding in Stepfamilies , Common Dynamics.

Inspiring Blended Family Quotes

In all the chaotic craziness of blended family life, it's easy to overlook the positive. Building Character Looking back at the nearly two decades of our journey, it's sometimes easy for me to complain about the difficulties we've had to face. Here are just a few… 3 Super Stepfamily Strengths Acceptance We all need to remember the wisdom from those great stepfamily gurus…The Rolling Stones when they sing, "You can't always get what you want! Free Private Coaching Session Ready for some personalized help with your blended family?

His exact words were, “I think this could be good for us.”

Flexibility Hi, I'm Mike and I'm a planner. Embrace the Super Strength of Flexibility! Resilience I love this definition of resilience: Strength in the Struggle I've lived my entire life in more than one blended family. From just about every angle, I personally know the struggles that come with blended family life. When Annie and Gary pledged to be together forever, a new family dynamic was thrust upon their children. The children now became step-siblings, barely knew each other, and were used to different households. This was not one big happy family; there was conflict, chaos and frustration.

The children did not get along well, were used to different sets of house rules, study habits, and different monthly allowances.

Sandy Shuler, a social worker and certified Canadian family educator in Calgary http: Expecting that there is going to be an instant connection and bonding situation when there are children involved can lead to disappointment and challenges," Shuler says. Shuler advises couples act proactively, and tackle issues before blending the family: New family relationships require time to form, making patience key. Time, commitment and patience are required of all family members if the new family unit is to succeed; Shuler says, "For some families, the best outcome is simply a cooperative co-existence.

Bonding takes time Don't expect children to love and adore each other or your new partner right away. In some cases, the best case scenario would be working towards courtesy and respect. Be open to discussion Creating opportunities for family discussions, problem-solving and negotiation helps children manage.

Prepare the family for a change Establishing new family patterns, rituals and traditions help children feel a sense of belonging and shared memories. Understand the new relationship Clarifying roles, responsibilities and expectations in the blended family serves as a "road map" with strategies for building relationships and a solid framework for the family unit.

Develop a conflict resolution strategy Conflict is a part of all families. Combined families have more complex and diverse needs and emotions in dealing with conflict; a solid conflict resolution model helps to address these issues. Demonstrate your love Children need reassurance that they are loved and are still a priority to their biological parent, as loyalty issues can arise. Discipline your own, and step back for his children The general rule of thumb about discipline is that the biological parent is the one who guides the discipline for their own children when there are step-children living together.